There are other good videos from this weekend, including one in which Tom proposes to Niki, and she accepts, at the Marine Corps Ball Saturday night, but I'm not sure they'd want me posting that one just yet. So we'll just stick to the basics for now.
Veda, crawling, cutely.
-Not sedated, mind you. Illustrated. And preferably by whoever used to do the covers of Time magazine in 1939.
To browse that particular publication, you'd picture former Vice President Nelson Rockefeller, noted public servant, statesman, businessman, art collector, and philanthropist, as looking about like this: 
Poke around a little further, though, and you get this picture of the man:
Still a dapper gent, don't get me wrong, it's just that he seemed to have lost a little of that matinee-idol quality in the transition from paint to photo.
Makes you wonder what that artist could do with your ugly mug, don't you think?
It's a little late for Veterans Day, but I just watched this two-minute movie, created by Rauch Bros. Animation in collaboration with StoryCorps, and had to share it.
Here's the summary from StoryCorps: "86-year-old WW II veteran Joseph Robertson remembers a German soldier he killed at the Battle of the Bulge."
Apologies if you can't view it in this post; try clicking the post title to link to the page where I watched it.
Germans in the Woods from Rauch Brothers on Vimeo.
Before Veda was born, and even since, one thing that's been on my mind a lot is how she'll "turn out."
I'm interested to see, of course, even though I do get a little squeamish about how I might affect the outcome. It's much easier to imagine yourself sitting back and beholding this little person sprouting up into a full-blown human being without your interference, you see - anytime it occurs to you that you, personally, will have a hand in the process it seems almost terrifyingly certain that you'll screw it up.
I'm sure this is universal among new parents, too. Your baby is just perfect the way she is, of course, and somehow getting even perfecter every day. (Mainly because she doesn't know what incredible goobers she landed as parents.) When the day comes that Veda can observe what I do, how I approach this task of living life, and take little baby notes, hoo boy. It's all downhill.
(Even the word "task," just there, felt like a wrong turn. Shouldn't I have said "opportunity" to live life? "Gleaming, shiny, blessed exalted lottery prize of consciousness"? But no, I go with "task." Arduous, agonizing, ugly obligation. Way to go, Pop.)
Can you imagine when she's able to ask me questions, and solicit my opinions on worldly matters such as justice and literature and how much jelly goes on a PBJ? Oh man. All I can say is, enjoy your ignorance while it lasts, little one.
***
Sometimes you're afraid to even make predictions. After all, before I'd even met Veda, I was on record as hoping she'd be happy, and here nine months later, what do we have? A little girl who draws comments from strangers: "Such a happy baby!"
Stuff's spooky, man. What if I'd hoped wrong?
I like the happy thing, though. I say we keep going with it. Even if that's the only quality Veda is ever noted for, fine. Her name means "knowledge and wisdom," which are also nice to have, but you can do without either, in my experience. Even when we were naming her, I felt a little peculiar about, you know, deciding someone's destiny and all. I actually ran across a picture of a couple of Vedas on a baby names site, and was happy to see that it still left a pretty wide range of personalities she could one day embody.
Lotta leeway there.
I momentarily thought it would be funny, a while back, to go the other direction and try to point out characteristics I hoped she *wouldn't* have, especially if I could name celebrities who fit the bill, even including unflattering pictures if possible.
But I quickly ran into trouble there. It turns out that most people have some redeeming qualities, encouragingly enough, and I honestly had a hard time finding *anyone,* obvious folks like Hitler and Stalin excluded, who I could say is or was such a failure as a human being that I prayed my daughter never resembled them.
It's actually a pretty awful thing to say. About anybody. Especially celebrities, you could argue, since you don't even know them that well. Plus they've got parents too, and you just know some of those moms and dads already shake their heads when they think about how their little boys' and girls' lives are going, so why pile on?
And besides, I may be Veda's dad, but who am I to say how she should or shouldn't be? I want her to be happy, yes, but free too. If I could click a button and ordain her fate right here and now? No way. As I thought about it, I pictured her as a 16-year-old one day, in 2025 (!), browsing her floating hologram web terminal, and finding an ancient post by her dumb ol' dad, saying he was crossing his fingers she didn't turn out, oh, to play the accordion.
She'd eye the virtual screen with horror, read and re-read the words, then cast her saddening gaze over to the pearly white music case leaning against the wall by the corner, and vow never to play "Beer Barrel Polka" again. Ever.
I just can't do that to her.
So what I settled on instead were circumstances I hoped never to see her in. That seemed safe enough. "Love the sinner, giggle at the sin," right? Finally, the funny pictures started to fall into place. Right away I noticed several snapshots I hope never feature Veda's face in them:
Again, these may all be fine, decent individuals, at least some of the time, once, maybe, but I think we can all (even these people's parents) agree that Mistakes Were Made in the events leading up to these photographs. And they're mistakes I'll do my best to prevent happening to my daughter.
I'll also refrain from making any political statements, but will say that I hope Veda is never captured making this face during the swearing-in of her successor to public office.
Overall, she's basically free to be whatever she wants, as long as it makes her happy and doesn't land her on a celebrity mugshot website. Unless, of course, she got arrested for, oh, I don't know, conscientious objection or something. Something virtuous and principled.
Preferably without a swastika tattooed into her forehead, though.
A dad can only ask for so much.
***
Basically, little one, just don't turn out like Carl Panzram. This charming fellow was described as "rage personified" -- by himself, in his autobiography -- and is said to have told his executioner, right before he was hanged for the murder of 22 people, "Hurry it up, you Hoosier bastard! I could kill ten men while you're fooling around!"
Ah, no.
But if, on the other hand, Veda as a young woman takes a liking to music, and makes incredibly charming out-of-genre covers of current pop hits, well, so much the better. Consider that particular choice of actions Officially Dad Sanctioned.
A few things to bear in mind if you decide to go as the cast of Rocky and Bullwinkle for Halloween:
- Almost nobody knows who Rocky and Bullwinkle are. The show went off the air in 1973, it says here, so actually I'm not entirely sure how I even know about them.
- Even fewer people know who Rocky and Bullwinkle's nemeses are, Boris Badenov and Natasha Fatale.
- When dressing up like Boris, bear in mind that it helps to be short and swarthy, only with sheet-white skin.
- When dressing up like Natasha, bear in mind that a purple dress and high heels don't provide much protection against October weather, especially in contrast to Boris's overcoat. This will make trick-or-treating less than appealing.
- When dressing your 8-month-old up like Rocky the Flying Squirrel, bear in mind that a costume built for dogs is actually pretty perfect, since it doesn't constrict the poor child very much and allows her cute face to be seen clearly.
- When dressing your dog as Bullwinkle, forget the white gloves and just go with clip-on antlers. Where were you going to find gloves that size anyway?
- Overall, if your family costume is this complex, involving multiple species and props such as a black-spraypainted 12lb. shot-put, try to get a plain background for the photos. Otherwise you can't see the bomb very well, or the antlers, and you kind of just look like a bunch of weirdos.
Happy Halloween, though!
