Thwackata Thwackata BRRRRROW

I love my airplane sounds CD. Fifteen tracks of glorious racket, all expertly recorded and digitally mastered—perfect for playing really really loud and watching your neighbors duck underneath their patio tables.

The disc I have, "Round Sounds Volume 2," features the unique sounds of radial engine aircraft, including the de Havilland Beaver, the T-28 Trojan, and the Lockheed Super Constellation, affectionately known as "Super Connie." Super Connie has four 18-cylinder R-3350 turbo compound engines, each with more than 3,000 horsepower.

I'm here to tell you—and I think the Mrs. will back me up on this—you hear every last piston firing when I crank this up in our living room. It's kind of like when you stick your tongue between your lips and go, "thbbt," except if you weighed three tons and had flaming jet fuel in your lungs.

VAH-RHOOOOOMA!