A Hundred Things About Me, Part Deux

11) A turn of phrase can earn my respect. My friend Geraldo, while ranting about the hospital bill he got after receiving treatment for a near-fatal spider bite on his eye, said later he couldn't believe how much they charged "just for saving my hapless ass." I bet I'll remember that twenty years from now.

12) I'm warming up to the notion that writing has to be narcissistic to work. Fiction writing, at least. My rationale is: if somebody's going to stick his head in my door and start talking, there's really not much else I'd expect him to discuss besides himself. People are interested in other people, and first-person stories are usually the most exciting.

13) i secretly enjoy eschewing capitalization, even though i know it's kind of a girl-writer thing.

14) You say "classy," I think "broad." Always will.

15) I fear that revealing a hundred little-known facts about myself will leave me with nothing more to reveal in case you and I should ever happen into a fireside chat.

16) I wish I were funny. I have several friends and acquaintances who are genuine, crack-your-ass-up funny, and I'm just not. It's the main thing, well, one of the main things, I've always wanted to be, but I've decided to content myself with just celebrating others who are funny.

17) I don't tell too many people about my affection for rap music, fearing I'll seem extra-white and dorky, but if I ever made you a mix CD you'd know right away.

18) There's a good chance no one will ever dress up as me for Halloween.

19) You wouldn't know it to look at me, but I have excellent credit.

20) I'm a good person to wear unusual clothing and totally "pull it off," because I almost never think about or even realize what I'm wearing.

21) I could build you a set of speakers that would disappear in your room and sound completely amazing for only about $20 in parts.

22) I deeply dislike the word "eclectic," although I'm really pretty fond of the concept.

23) One of my childhood friends used to pronounce "spaghetti" and "binoculars" as "pasghetti" and "binocliears," and I liked that a lot too.

24) I majored in Philosophy in college, but I was a lot more interested in it back then than I am now, for some reason. I think it might have been that I was hoping for answers, and of course that's not what you get when you study philosophy. Not that I still want answers - I understand about all that, their inscrutability and fleeting, subjective, conciliatory nature and all, but now it's just harder to get excited about studying all these questions. I fully expect to get interested in Philosophy again later in life.


Thomas said...

16, me too, and it erhks me.

Anonymous said...

about 20... when I eventually send you a BIG TURK (which I will, I swear, sometimes before the end of this particular century) I'm gonna send you a puffy shirt and see if you can pull that off. That would be a REAL coup.

xo Wee

Anonymous said...

also... as regards #11... me too. In fact, you may have won my heart for all time with "zephyrs of emotion" or at least that part of my heart that hasn't already been staked out by some anonymous British Reporter who dubbed Ricky Gervais (of The Office) a "chubby funster".

xo Wee redux

Colin said...

Chubby funster! Oh man!

I'm also crazy for my "iTunes Download-a-Day" desk calendar. A couple weeks back they described Slim Galliard as "joyously nutso." I darn near framed it.

RE: puffy shirt -- as long as its puffs aren't billowy enough to enter my field of vision, I'll sport that sucker indefinitely... carrying myself through my daily affairs with fashionable ignorance.

Anonymous said...

ah! When I first read that, I thought it said "joyless nutso." but no, it's joyous. Personally, I think "joyless" is better.

and really? You'd wear the puffy shirt? Really, really?

Cuz I may take you up on that, you know. And then I'd need you to substantiate your claim with abundant photographic evidence. Post outloud and up front on the net. For all to see.

But I like you, so I'll give you the opportunity to recant.

Also, vis a vis the small cap girl-writer thang... I sort of think of the lack of cap as being a guy thing. As in e.e. cummings. 'Cuz isn't he the one to blame?

that said, I am frequently guilty of the lack of cap. However, in my case, it has little to do with estrogen and a lot to do with laziness. Which if questioned, I will indubitably attribute to whimsy instead. But don't be fooled. It's just laziness. Uncapped, unkempt, unadulturated and shlumpy.

xo Wee

P.S. Um... can you tell I'm procastinating? is it obvious?

Colin said...

Not at all. And I will hereby admit with great embarrassment that I didn't realize e.e. cummings was a man. Jeesh. This is worse than the Ansel Adams debacle of '03.

p.s. Did you notice there was no recanting in this message? None whatsoever. Bring it!

Anonymous said...

Confession: I was all prepared to gloat about my knowledge of e.e. and his man bits, but then I had a moment of panic and self-doubt and had to look it up to be sure.

i WAS right, for the record, but all the glee has gone outta the gloating. damn.

xo wee

p.s. you may live to regret that challenge there, Dullaghan. Or if you don't, I'm reasonably sure Penelope will. :D